Yep, the day when bakers try - and mostly fail - to remember what a shamrock looks like.
Here, I'll give you a hint:
NOT THIS.
OR THIS.
They're also not lumpy Xs:
Broccoli stalks:
Wonky crosses:
Or cacti!
Got all that?
Ok... GO.
See, now you're just screwing with me.
Tell you what, bakers, just go back to making leprechauns.
I mean pots of gold.
I mean rainbows.
OH NEVER MIND.
Thanks to Sheree K., Jerod J., Marisa F., Vanessa L., Paula P., Adrienne L., Julie S., Liz, Michael L., & Cara D. for proving there IS such a thing as too much green beer.
Thanks, Michelle and bunny Magical Carrot! Michelle writes, “Here’s Magical Carrot on her favorite little carpet where she does binkies! And she loves to make a few chews on daddy’s work bag because she also wants to be a home inspector when she grows up.”
In 1873, Jules Verne published Around the World in 80 Days, the story of Phileas Fogg and his attempt to circumnavigate the globe to win a bet. Now, we can accomplish the same feat in just over two days, with another couple of days added in to get through airport security. (Well, I always manage to get behind that guy...) Today, let's slow down a little and retrace Phileas' trip.
The first thing most people think about when they hear Around the World in 80 Days is a hot air balloon. I found this amazing balloon cake with two guys who might be Phileas and his valet, Passepartout.
Isn't this gorgeous? Wouldn't it be great for a little circumnavigating? There's just one problem -- it never happened. There's no hot air balloon travel in the book.
Pay no attention to any perceived anachronisms -- Jules Verne was a visionary who predicted electric submarines and video conferencing. An edible double-decker bus wouldn't have stretched his imagination at all.
This is much too peaceful and zen-like to run past on the way to your next stop. If I hadn't been rooting for Phileas to win, I'd have made him stop for a nice cup of tea.
Sadly, leisurely refreshments weren't in the cards, but a trip to San Francisco was.
It's just wicked that he didn't have time to catch a show, but the schedule was getting VERY tight, and Phileas still had to get back across the Atlantic.
After inciting a mutiny and burning most of the wooden parts of a ship for steam, Phileas and friends made it to Ireland,
Sadly, it appeared they were a day late -- but of course, it wasn't that black and white.
They'd forgotten about the International Date Line! Upon realizing the correct date, Phileas rushed to his club and won the bet! Significantly richer, he married his lady love and settled down to a quiet life.
(Maybe he even bought a hot air balloon...)
Happy Sunday!
*****
P.S. I've been waiting for an excuse to buy these, so thought I'd share in case you have one:
My wife went into a cake maker to get a small cake for my birthday. They asked what she’d like on it and she said, "How about the Chicago 'C', like The Chicago Bears’ 'C' logo? Is that possible?"
They said, "The Chicago C? No problem."
...it was the funniest present I’ve ever received.
Let's hope that Justina felt the same way about her University of Michigan cake, which was supposed to look like this:
But ended up looking like this:
Oh! A swing and a miss!
Karen M.'s son asked for the Alabama "A" on his birthday cake. To help the bakery out, his aunt brought in a photocopy of his Alabama hat to use as a reference.
(Can you sense where this is going? If not, then you really haven't been reading this blog long enough. Heh.)
Ready?
Here's the cake:
Thank goodness they didn't bring the actual hat in; that icing would take forever to clean off.
March 13th, 2026: Okay so Toronto's weather got colder EVERY SINGLE DAY LAST WEEK, thus, my earlier declaration that "spring in here" must be retracted. Only Fool's Spring was here, and true spring remains but a distant dream >:(
Today is Ken Day, bebeh doll, and that means I'm here to make all your sexy, sexy dreams come true.
Except maybe that one.
(Never again, Cancun. NEVER AGAIN.)
That's right, my sprinkle-coated sugar dumpling, I am about to rock your world ... by dealing you a hand of Blackjack:
Or, wait... this is a hot tub? Oh. Ok. EVEN BETTER. Mrowr.
Now, slide that sweet little personality of yours over here, and have an enormous glass of ketchup:
I warmed up this side of the concrete slab just for you. [eyebrow waggle]
What's wrong, my tangy berry sweet tart? Is the concrete not to your liking?
Perhaps you'd prefer some Satin Ice* sheets?
I don't lounge this casually for just anyone, you know. Mostly because I lack articulated elbows.
(*That one's for you, decorators.)
These boxers are really confining, though, my scrumptious fondant-wrapped cheesecake bite.
Here, let me slip into something a little more comfortable:
You can't see it, but I'm totally flexing for you right now. Unnng.
Ahh, I can tell by your dismayed expression that you're thinking EXACTLY what I'm thinking, my honey-drenched pudding pop: this DOES cover up too many of my "finer assets." [wink] Well, don't you worry. I can fix that.
[grunting]
[squelching noises]
Ok, my candy-coated cake pop! Prepare to meet ... THE LOINCLOTH OF LOVE:
Take me away, officer; I surrender to YOUR SEXINESS.
Oh, and I should warn you: objects in the rear view are much hotter than they appear.
[jiggle jiggle]
Thanks to Sara O., Sanne V., Mary Ann B., Frank M., Laura S., Renee D., & Lauri M. for helping me retroactively ruin a lot of people's childhoods.
*****
A few years ago, after John and I first published this post, we received an e-mail from readers Charity and Royce. That e-mail contained an audio file. An audio file that, once played, would change our lives forever.
Or at least make us laugh like hyenas for a good five minutes.
So today, for your wrecking pleasure, we present that audio, combined with our original visuals. Turn up the volume, and ENJOY.
Note from john (thoJ): When I was making this video, I pitched down Royce's voice just a bit for sexiness. When I showed Jen, she asked if I could pitch it way UP. The result is, if possible, even more hysterical.
Okay, this is about six months off-season, but I love this picture so much I wanted to share it with all of you. This photo was taken by Dawn Wilson last September; she writes:
Peek-a-boo!
Hard for arctic hares to hide this time of year when they have already turned white yet the snow has not yet fallen.
Sometimes cake shopping is like being stuck in a Fractured Fairy Tale.
Like Snow White, you set out hoping for something "charming," but in the light of day you find yourself stuck with the second string dwarves.
There's Creepy:
Made by the incredibly talented Sarah Jones "I dare you to cut me."
Queasy:
"I can't believe I ate ITS WHOLE WING."
Crazy:
"WOOLOOLOOOLALALAAAAAAAA!!"
Drippy:
(Queasy's second cousin)
Hairy:
She's planning on using your birthday candles for a waxing later.
Horny:
"Because I have horns, you see. And I'm really Randy.
"(It's short for Randolph. Horny is my ... [sunglasses] ... MIDDLE NAME.)"
And of course, that old favorite:
.doc
Thanks to Stacey, Kimberly C., Carly G., Rachel K., Anony M., Bob B., & Jessica C., who know a picture is worth a thousand words - or in this case, one printable image file.
*****
I will make up for that with not one, but TWO cute unicorn mugs:
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